Energy Body (Playlist)

It has been a while since I let my energy body be felt more than my physical body.

The human, meaty, flesh suit is wondrous for completing tasks and navigating through this material world. It keeps me safe and protected. It gives me feet to feel grounded upon the floor and hands to hold memories in my palms. It is easy for me to forget how much energy rushes and surges through me and others around me. It is also quite easy to get caught up in seeing each other as characters, rather than these beautiful bodies of energy. When I get too wrapped up in the characters in my head, or the characters my mind forms thanks to what my eyes see, I have to come back to my soul. I have to come back to the essence of my being. The eyes can be deceiving, the brain matter can grasp at straws, but the energy never lies. Energy is never created or destroyed. It is only transformed, transmuted.

When I am steadily calling somebody out by name I remember names can be changed too. The name I thought I was tarnishing is bringing a smile to another one’s face. Most of the problems I face come from a stuck and stagnant perspective. I am quickly learning how to let my emotions run their course because soon enough I know I will return to love.

I compiled a playlist of music that brings me back to my energy body:

Its Not Fall Anymore But Let's Fall In Love (Playlist)

Hi,

I wanted to put something together for you guys to listen to this winter.

I’ve found summer and winter to be some of the hardest times of the year to get through, personally. I’ve had a few difficult, pivotal summers that dimmed the sunshine for me. However, I have tried my best to take every summer since then, for what it is. Winter, on the other hand, has been a rough time for a long time. Most of it started from Christmas’s with argumentative parents. Then, when I was 9 years old my grandma passed away. It was the first death I had ever experienced. I’ll admit I didn’t really know how to process the loss at that age but as the years went by and I observed my families processes, it started to hurt more. My family took the hit hard. My Nana was such a ray of light, warmth, and comfort to the family. My family is full of clashing personalities and characters, all of which she was always able to settle and calm down with love.

My mom losing her own mother was a pain I couldn’t and still am not capable of wrapping my head around. She lost herself for years when she lost her mother. Every winter, we braced ourselves for the solemn December. Crying. Unanswered questions. Anger. Frustration. Hopelessness. In the end though, we always found Strength.

Not only have my winters been tinged with sadness through my own experiences but I believe its come with realizing the year and everything that has occurred within that year, is ending. December rolls around and we reflect on the past 11 months of our lives. The wins, the losses, all of it. I don’t like to reflect on my losses simply because I don’t see them as losses at all. I embrace and thank everything and every moment for entering my life even if it’s for a single second. I relay everything back to love. Even in hurtful or upsetting situations, I’m still reminded of and taught to love. I used to become saddened at the absence of love, forgetting there is never an absence of love at all. I’ve lost loved ones but i’ve also found and strengthened love with others through those losses. & when others aren’t around, I take the time to love myself even more. Falling in love isn’t about kissing and hugging, but sharing and growing. Fall in love with the sun’s warmth on a breezy day. Fall in love with the way your dog greets you at the door. Fall in love with the outfit you picked for the day. Fall in love with your best friends ability to check in on you occasionally. Fall in love with your body allowing you to cry. Fall in love with the coffee shop down the street. Fall in love with the dinner your mom cooked. Fall in love with the people, places, and things you’ve neglected. Fall deeper in love with those you already love. Love is limitless and love is ever-growing.

I always turn to music when my own words can’t express my emotions. So, I put together this playlist to show you what my winter sounds like.

I want you all to know that no matter what you’re feeling or going through, you aren’t alone. Life is beautiful and love is everywhere. Don’t let yourself fall out of love with life. Its not fall anymore but lets fall in love.

LISTEN UP

hello!! 

let me take a moment to start off saying, this blog is a part of me. however, as much as its a huge part of me, i have always wanted to keep it up to spread new things to others. as time passed and my creative blocks stood at the forefront, i made a big realization. basically, this blog started off as a music blog as you all may know. but what a lot of you might NOT know is that that was never the initial intention. I wanted an all around blog. something for everything. now that was really ambitious to tackle on head first, so i gravitated around music because i feel like a lot of my inspiration and influence stems from music. i wanted this to be a safe space for all creatives and artists, i just chose to start off with music. i wanted to include photography, clothing pieces, music, drawings, paintings, EVERYTHING. I honestly have been so stuck with this blog, no lie, but i couldn't figure out why. its apparent now that i need to just put out content that doesn't fit into a box. i don't wanna force myself to feel like i need to solely put out content i think others WANT.  so heres me apologizing for not being as transparent as i really wanted to be on this blog. im going to start. i know this should have been the intent from the start but we all gotta start somewhere right? 

a bit of an explanation on whats been going on:

- not much honestly hahaha

but really. in the past few months the only real changes i've been dealing with are working full time and having a full time bf simultaneously hahahahah. i was working two jobs up until last week, meaning i was working 7 days with a 1-2 hour daily commute tackled on. so... i didnt have much time to myself to say the least but now i have two days off. which is a huge weight off my shoulders because i not only have time to accomplish the bigger things i had been putting off, but even the small little things that have built up over time. 

this post is all over the place but basically what im trying to say is this will still be the blog you know and love, but my heart will be in it more now. i hope you can enjoy it just as much <3 The next couple of posts will be actual topics, and themes and everything but to keep this light i thought id shoot y'all this playlist that i was talking about on my twitter hahaha honestly theres not much to it, and if you don't like this kind of music then you'll prob think i'm lame but i don't care this playlist makes me feel great. ima make it a mix eventually btw.

No Vacancy (A playlist by Koren)

My friends and I are always sharing music with each other. They all have such beautiful, and diverse tastes. One night, I was on rabb.it (its pretty much a streaming service/site/app that allows you to share a screen with multiple people and watch/listen to the same thing at the same time) ((I highly recommend rabb.it for online hangouts with your friends)) with my friend Koren. He started to play music and I honestly was so captivated by his music choice. I knew he always had good taste but I had never seen this side of his music taste, in depth like this. So, I asked him if he'd put together a playlist for the blog. I really appreciate his music taste so I figure you guys will too. This playlist is so chill and dope. I love it. Every song has such a smooth, clean sound. 

I asked Koren if he wanted to write anything regarding his playlist, he said he just wanted to say "the playlist is dedicated to Uriel" <3

Aside from his amazing taste in music, Koren's just a talented guy all around.

He makes music, and is also super good with graphic design stuff. He actually has helped me out a ton with this blog, from posting for me when I couldn't, to creating the site layout itself, to just constantly supporting any content posted. 

If you need any beats, or artwork done for something please please hit him up. You wont be disappointed (He did the artwork for this playlist). I'll link his @ so you guys can hit him up if you ever need anything. 
 

Korens Twitter: @beatsbykoren

Love: A work In Progress (Playlist)

Hi guys!

So, in all honesty, when its come to this blog lately, i've had a bit of a "creative block" in a sense. But, instead of having a lack of ideas, its more-so an overflow of ideas. It'll make more sense as to why after I explain a few things.

Before I started this blog, I was battling my own "inner demons." I had hit my low. This bout with depression really overcame me. I was entirely unhappy. As melodramatic as it sounds, it's the truth. I felt true, genuine sadness and unhappiness with who I was and where I was in life. I really had no sense of self. & i'll say, if you've felt this, you know how altering it can be to everything you've ever felt was real before. I was pretty much always sad. It started becoming familiar. The feeling of sadness became something I was accepting and coming to terms with. I wasn't continuing to deny the obvious elephant in the room (which was my depression). I wasn't fighting it anymore. I wasn't looking for a way out, because I found one without even consciously realizing at first. All I wanted at this point was to feel sure of myself, and only myself.

I had convinced myself completely that the life I had wasn't real in order to subconsciously cope with my depression. I was convinced life wasn't real. That nothing and no one actually existed. Everything and every one around me was just some figment of my imagination. Everything in this world, I created. It was sort of a paradoxical mindset given, despite being incredibly reckless & not caring about anyone around me, I took a lot of new risks in my life. Risks i'll never regret taking because I am in a much better place in my life right now. & I wouldn't be here had I not stepped outside of my fear to face the unknown. I did have to find my personal balance though because being in that state of mind was also very toxic. But I think sometimes we have to recognize life as our own personal storybooks. The "Crybaby Mix 1" was pretty much a mix encompassing what I felt at the start of my journey. That mix came effortlessly for me because my emotions and feelings were distinct for me and all the songs I compiled really resonated with those tangible emotions."Helianthus", the first playlist I posted on this blog, also came easy for me because of how in tune I had already become with that sadness (which stemmed from my quest for self expression and love). So if you go back and listen, it has a sad but almost... excited feeling to it. I was excited by all the new risks in my life I was taking and WHERE they were taking me. However, as I said, I was centered in and by sadness. 

Now let me get back to my "creative block", as I mentioned at the beginning of this post. My "love: a short story" playlist, showcases how I started feeling lately: Happy. That playlist doesn't project contentment though. Instead, it exudes excitement of potential. And in all honesty thats a less embarrassing way of saying "still feeling pretty damn unsure about love and who I am". I didn't love myself enough to think I was enough for myself so I searched for any form of love others were willing to give me. How pathetic of me to title it "love: a short story" so as to trivialize love. Anyways, after that playlist is when the "creative block" struck me. It wasn't the happiness that was unfamiliar to me. No, i've been happy before. It was fulfillment that felt unfamiliar to me. Shortly after that playlist things significantly changed in my life. Overall. My family life, work life, love life, everything. THIS playlist, "love: a work in progress" was harder for me to put together because of how unfamiliar the feeling of fulfillment is for me (which leads back to my "creative block" being here because i'm still getting used to not just centering myself and finding balance in sadness, but different emotions instead. And its overwhelming having more than just downcast thoughts). I wanted to make a playlist that showed the other, not so cynical side of love. It is essentially the sequel to "love: a short story". It radiates... calmness. Something, the short story didn't really ever accomplish since it describes both the chase for love and the cease of love, rather than the actual feeling of love. A work in progress means acceptance of growth. This overwhelming feeling of love i've recently felt comes from more than just others. It comes significantly from within myself, to myself. I finally feel sure of myself as a person, enough to sincerely feel and express the whole concept of love. I guess the cliche "you cant love anyone else unless you love yourself first" actually holds complete truth. I'd like to describe this accomplishment as... fulfillment. Fulfillment is so much more... filling. Something that means more to me than just happiness alone. With that being said, "love: a work in progress" is what love and happiness and gratitude feel like for me. These songs were so impactful to me & all have a purpose to this ever-growing "story". So I hope you enjoy, & thank you for taking the time to read this super duper long sappy post.

(also shoutout to those that truly showed me this life IS real & is pretty damn beautiful. You know who you are. I can't and will never be able to thank you enough for helping me see the things I couldn't see in both myself, and life. The past few months could easily have been the worst couple months of my life but they somehow managed to be incredibly eye opening and truly, truly beautiful. Ones that i'll never ever forget)

---

Instrumentals (Playlist)

Hi!

So I wanted to share some pure instrumental songs with you guys. I feel like we only seek music out if its overwhelmingly saturated with different sounds, lyrics, or adlibs. I'll admit I only really listened to music like that. I thought instrumentals were boring and unnecessary. They just felt lacking, and unfinished to me. Over time though, I realized, I just didn't have the appreciation for it (sadly). Now, I find so much beauty in them, that I want to share it and hopefully get others to see how incredible they truly are. 

With normal songs, there is a preset, predetermined feeling and idea the artist is trying to convey to the listener. Which, is great, but instrumentals allow you to interpret and understand them in your OWN way. I was playing this playlist around my brother and his fiance. My brother said "these songs are too feel-y" while his fiance, on the other hand, said "this sounds like HBO porn music" LMFAO. So... I think I proved my point without even trying to LOL. Its true though, you really are able to take what you want out of instrumentals. Thats why I appreciate them so much. Their meaning can change with every listen. Listening to instrumentals also helps you develop an appreciation for producers. You're able to hear raw, beats, for what they are. No additives. 

With that being said, I hope you guys enjoy this playlist I put together of some of my favorite ambient/lo-fi/downtempo instrumentals. Its great background music for anything really; riding in the car, cleaning your room, laying in bed, showering, etc etc. Experience something new :)

For The Aux (Playlist)

Hello everyone!

I know it's getting close to a month since my last post. BUT I know you guys tend to like playlists (and I really enjoy making them and putting them together), so i've been working on a handful of different playlists for you guys. They ALL have different vibes, themes, and ideas behind them. 

I had a poll up on my twitter asking you guys which kind of playlist you'd like first and y'all voted on chill bangers, so here it is. This is a playlist I think is really good to just put on in the car when you don't wanna listen to the same repetitive radio hits over and over again, or if someone hands you the aux and you have no idea what to put on. It isn't super hype but it isn't too chill. Its a good in-between. It's hip hop, for the most part, but there are some r&b tracks incorporated as well. I tried not to put super overplayed songs on here, because I figure you guys come here for new content, and that's what you deserve. However, that doesn't mean all of the songs in this playlist are new or unheard of! This is literally a playlist of 45 songs that i've really been feeling lately, and I hope you do too!

I never really said this when posting my other playlists but I pretty much always suggest listening to my playlists on shuffle (unless I say otherwise) because I don't put them in any specific order. I find that putting it on shuffle makes it more enjoyable to go back and listen to in the future since you aren't getting the same exact experience every time because you're listening in a different order! 

HOPE YOU ENJOY!

https://soundcloud.com/sofiacampa/sets/fortheaux